How to Refocus after setbacks
How to Refocusing after setbacks is the subject of todays post.
First an apology on lack of blog posts ! I am just getting used to this technical thing! and forgot to load up the posts to automatically come on while I was out of the office last week.
Whenever I am out of the office and with clients there is always lots of rich material and learnings to share. Last week some clients we are working with had a couple of setbacks. The session was spent helping them reframe what had happened and looking at strategies to deal with set backs as they arise. I thought it would be an idea to share it with you.
It would be great to think that everything in life will turn out hunky dory? Well this isn’t usually the case. In honesty we wouldn’t want it to be either.
I don’t know about you but often the toughest times I have experienced have taught me the best lessons ever. Setbacks do have a place.
How many times have you started a diet, a new way of thinking, or tried something different and then a setback occurs and you just go back to the way you were?
Don’t worry, you are not the only one!
Setbacks difficulties or challenges as I was taught to call them!! occur all of the time – they are a natural activity of life.
There are two ways of facing challenges.
You either change or alter the difficulty or you can alter yourself to be able to deal with it.
Deal with difficulties correctly and it will enhance your confidence, deal with them incorrectly and they can do some serious damage to your self worth.
When you are faced with any setback your ability to deal with it can be turned around into a position of strength by asking yourself positive empowering questions.
There is an unwritten rule that says:
Ask your mind a stupid question and you will get a stupid answer!
So, if after setback you ask yourself something like
“Why does this always happen to me, I never have any luck?”
Your mind will probably come out with:
“Because you are useless and good things do not happen to you!”
Sound familiar?
Instead, if you ask yourself a positive empowering question like:
“What did I learn from this setback for next time?”
Your mind will kick into solution mode and help.
Here are some rules and things to think about when setbacks do occur:
Acknowledge that it has happened. Don’t hide from it. These things happen. So what?
What positive empowering questions can you ask yourself?
What is good about this situation?
How can I make the most of this situation?
What can I learn from it?
What are the facts about this problem?
How can we make it a successful outcome?
• Acknowledge that setbacks occur to everyone and you are not being singled out.
• View them as a challenge to overcome rather than an issue or problem
Think about the negative dis-empowering thoughts that you think on a regular basis after a setback.
What new empowering questions could you ask yourself to give some better answers!
Write these down now and make them a habit.
To you and your teams Success
Denise
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